After helping my grandfather get dressed, I asked my sister if she's all set.
"I guess. My stuff are all downstairs with my bag."
"Good. Would you help me take him downstairs?"
I beckoned over for my grandfather. At the sound of my voice, he suddenly looked up with bright, excited eyes.
"My mamma!" He pulled me and hugged me tightly. Stunned, I gave in to his strength and he cried on my shoulder calling "Oh my mamma, how long had it been since I've last seen you. It's my mamma. It's my mamma. Oh I love you mamma. Please don't leave me. Please, please don't leave me."
I melted when I heard the passion in his quiet cries. My grandfather has a memory lapse and he doesn't recognise any of us as his family. I can't bear to hear him like this.
"Don't leave me, mamma!"
"Don't worry, I won't."
Only then he was in a calmer state and I felt like the world's biggest cheat. I am not his mom. I am not anyone's mom. To wake him up from his dream seems cruel. To go on with an act I don't think I could carry makes me feel sly, as if I am feeding off an old man's euphoria.
How am I going to face him again?
Update: Half an hour later he seems to forget the episode and is apparently contented to have me calling him grandfather. It seems to give a positive effect on him though, he seems happier now than he had been a few day ago. I'm not sure how am I to take it